carnal lightening reaped my brain in verves of
sickled fever, emotion sloughing clean
my tortured psyche.
and who was I to challenge
this narcotic self ablution –
yet, what of my resolve to linger
in bias mental disarray?
engorged my blood
as nothing new.
the tension burning scars within this
manic unenlivened carcass
my hybrid self assaulted what was once
unfailed but often wrong integrity
as swifter than a scarlet blade
my conscience was absconded
to a heaven: peace, release, and ease.
had I commanded armies to retreat?
my palsied mind
was finally worth its bloody ground
and tissues thick with matters
fed on independence
lost among the strain.
I must remember where I left my genius.
© Tamara Natividad | pisceanesque.com | Written 24 June, 2004